13 May 2006

Don Brash's press conference advice

After a sterling press conference performance this week, it was obvious that the Leader of Her Majesty's Loyal Opposition, Dr Don Brash, had paid particularly close attention to his National Party briefings, according to these hypothetical transcripts by Scoop's Lyndon Hood.

DB: I shall pretend to be hopelessly confused about everything. That way, even if these accusations gain any traction, they won't pin a thing on me. And I shall pretend not to have any idea what's in the email.

Nat: How could you convince anyone of that?

DB: Hmm. Perhaps I shall fail to bring a copy of it, and - oh this is very droll - ask one of the journalists for a copy. That way, if I have to disavow anything I've said previously, my feigned sudden recollection will be all the more credible. The fools will never suspect anything. Mwa ha ha ha!

Nat: Genius!

DB: What's more, I shall repeatedly make that 'aeh' noise to further disarm their suspicions! Excellent!

- Scoop.co.nz

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